It's a Conspiracy, Man! (Part Two)

The historic Reformation was an attempt to return the church to the Scriptures. Even as the Reformation first spread through Europe, Reformed practice and theology diverged widely from region to region. As the Reformation has now spread across the globe, these divergences have only increased. Even as we are approaching the five hundredth anniversary of Luther’s ninety-five theses, the variety of expressions found in Reformed churches continues to increase.

At the same time, not every segment of the Reformation remained true to what the Reformation was originally about. At some point, such infidelity causes a church to be Reformed in name-only.

Because of this infidelity, various Reformed sects have tried to claim that they alone are the true heirs of the Reformation. We at the AFVSB are proud to carry on this sectarian battle.

Although we represent a microscopic trickle from the ocean of Reformed traditions, nevertheless, we are currently engaged in a hostile takeover of the historic Reformation. This is a political attempt to kidnap the historic Reformation and destroy those who disagree. Some might call this a reign of terror. We like to call it “Modern Reformation.”

We make every effort to present the Reformation as a monolithic movement of which we Klinians are alone the heirs. This has been done through a very selective reading of church history by people who know better. Historical revisionism is our middle name.

The chief error of the Federal Visionists is not theological, but political. The Federal Visionists want a piece of the pie; they want a place at the table called “Reformed.” This is a tactical mistake.

We do not want merely a piece of the pie or a place at the table. We want to be the pie. We want to be the table. That is why there is no room for charitable discussion or peacable disagreement. Those who disagree with us are out. It has to be this way. Our gospel is at stake!

It's a Conspiracy, Man! (Part One)

For those who have not yet figured it out, there is an enormous difference between the original Reformation and our Modern Reformation. The original Reformation was largely about re-aligning the church with the Bible. Hence, the expression, “reformed according to the word.”

Many people assume that our Modern Reformation has the same goal, as in continuing to re-align the church with the Bible. However, nothing could be further from the truth.

Our Modern Reformation is all about reforming the church, but not according to the word. Our goal is to re-align the church to Meredith Kline’s quirky version of Reformed theology.

Rather than attempting to use Biblical words in their Biblical sense, we have dedicated ourselves to using Biblical words in a strictly Klinian sense. We have also managed to add most of Kline’s extra-Biblical concepts to our Modern Reformed vocabulary.

Thus, the difference between the original Reformation and our Modern Reformation is one of textual orientation. The original Reformation was oriented to the Bible. Our Modern Reformation is oriented to Meredith Kline. This change is known as the textual revolution.

Thus, to be Reformed used to mean “Reformed According to the Word.” Not anymore. Reformed now means Reformed According to Kline (RAK). Thus, unless you have been RAK-ed, you are not “Reformed.”

In just a few years, our textual revolution has swept through the Reformed world. This was no accident of history. Kline’s followers have worked tirelessly at establishing a Holy Sextuplet of organizations dedicated to replacing the Bible with Kline.

1) The magazine, Modern Reformation, has been one of our most effective means of disguising Kline as the historic Reformed faith. Readers assume that because we pair the words “Modern” and “Reformation,” that we are attempting to continue the original Reformation. Amazingly, few realize that we are doing nothing of the sort.

2) Our radio program, The White Horse Inn, has also been a terrific vehicle for recasting the Reformation to march to the tune of Kline. By including a Lutheran and a “Reformed” Baptist, listeners are led to believe that we are broadly Reformed, in the historic sense. Not so! It’s all Kline, all the time.

3) The Alliance of Confessing Evangelicals (ACE) has been a remarkable productive in taking over Calvindom. Many think that “Confessing” simply refers to being bound by the historic Reformed confessions. However, to join ACE, you must confess to a Klinian reading of these confessions. This is why we privately refer to ACE as the Alliance of Constipated Evangelicals.

4) Our flagship school, Westminster Seminary California (WSC), has been instrumental in our hostile takeover of the Reformed world. Obviously, this is a huge advantage because we have the opportunity to brainwash future pastors in the Truly Reformed faith. Our graduates may not be able to navigate the Scriptures, but at least they know how to discern Law and Gospel.

5) The internet has also been a major tool in the Klinsing of Reformed theology. The number of Truly Reformed blogs is Legion. This has allowed first-year seminary students, disgruntled church members, and self-appointed scholars to play a pivotal role in reshaping Reformed thinking.

6) The sixth pearl in our promotion of the Gospel according to Escondido is the attack on the Federal Vision. Although this originated from an unlikely source, we quickly realized the import of jumping on this bandwagon.

We freely admit that the goals of the Federal Vision are more in line with the original Reformation. This is why it is so important that we utterly destroy the Federal Vision. They are the biggest threat to our Modern Deformation of the historic Reformed faith. The AFVSB has been pleased to play a small part in this mutiny.